Worse than it looks....

That's....it? From a fall that felt like the bone was going to pop out the skin like an overripe pimple on a Domino's employee forehead? That's had me wincing every time I sit down all day? Granted, it's the angriest shade of purple I've seen this side of paintball. Still, it looks tremendously weedy given the sore and the ouch and the bag of peas down my pants for half of training and then SISTER WRECK'D ME PUNCHING THE BLOODY THING.

The lesson there is that you can't rely on impressive hits to deliver impressive bruises. Last night's training was the final one before the bout Saturday night, and as the clock runs down we're following our diets and exercise plans and getting ourselves ready for what feels as important as a grand final. Mascara Massacre has the feel of a team with something to prove, to ourselves if nothing else. We've worked incredibly hard for this, and I think that no matter what happens we'll have given absolutely everything we have.

Speaking of diets, after my little pause and hum over being told I wasn't eating enough earlier in the month, I appear to have got over the hump. Porridge for breakfast, the obligatory toast and peanut butter for lunch, and I'm getting better at remembering to eat (and cook!) in the evenings and that snacking is fine. I think I needed the brain dump after being told that to sort out a few bits and bobs in my head (and a massive thank you to everyone who e-mailed, facebooked and spoke to me about that post, pretty awesome to know there are all these people out there in my corner!).

The blog is nearly up to 3000 views since I started it in January. Things have changed for me immensely in that time, both in derby and in the real world. I just wanted to say thanks to everyone who reads this, it's pretty cool that other people find this readable! After the bout I'll be reviewing Gumball toe-stops (had them a wee while, been giving them a thorough going-over), Pro-Tech Dent mouthguards (apparently the best in derby, can't be worse than my current $10 special from the pharmacy) and a load of other stuff. If you've got something you want me to write about, share, review or whatever, then get in touch!

The Fresh Meat Instructional.

I SHOULD be painting some furniture, or going to the gym, or doing anything that isn't sitting on my beanbag looking at my laptop. But I'm not. So here's a post.

Starting out in derby is, frankly, terrifying. There are a hundred ways of doing every little technique, the gear looks like it costs thousands, and asking for help if you're anything like me can be, uh, difficult. After the fresh meat open day I had the idea of putting up the links and vids that helped me out, and I hope you find something useful here too.

DISCLAIMER- I have been skating since July 2010 and have just sat and passed my skills test. I do not profess to be a super-genius coach, skater, player or mechanic, but figure that my knowledge is pretty fresh and I know what questions I wanted answered when I started out. All opinions stated in this post are my own, and I accept no responsibility for any falls, decapitations or bearing dissolving that occur from trying out the stuff seen in these links. Please, please try out what works for you and SHARE WHAT YOU'VE LEARNT. There's a comment box on here, I love reading and learning new stuff!

MOVING AROUND

Stopping. Stray Cat bouts with Central Coast Roller Derby, and has made heap of useful basic how-tos that tend to pop up a lot when you search for roller derby on youtube. In this clip, she demonstrates the three main stops in derby and explains them all pretty concisely.



Crossovers. This is the video that got me going from "coke bottles" to full-on cross-overs with all 8 wheels on the ground. I remember watching this when I was actually having real trouble just doing coke bottles, and tried the technique out at a public skate. I'm now totally comfortable crossing my legs (steady now) and it made a huge difference to my skating.



She's got a few more but I really rate these two for if you're starting out and want to go over what you saw in training.

GEAR

Buying stuff for derby can be a massive drain on your energies and wallet, particularly living in a part of the world where there are few skate shops that have even heard of roller derby, let alone see it as something that is potentially enormously profitable (Hello, NotexpensiveSkates!) Throwing down hundreds of dollars on gear and shipping fees, only to find that the skates you ordered are the wrong size (or, as in one memorable case, ordering black skates with green wheels to be sent fluoro green skates with green trucks and wheels), or not suitable for derby, can be pretty demoralising. And then, even when you get them, how do you look after them? Once again, the internet provides.

For all you NZ skaters out there, I highly recommend One Woman 8 Wheels. Based in Palmerston North (but don't hold that against her!), Joanie Trash imports a wide range of skates from freshie-friendly budget options to the really high-end wishlist kit. She's fast, friendly, doesn't pay me to advertise her and will advise you on the best skate for your needs and will even help you navigate the nightmare that is American shoe sizing. by shopping with her you're also supporting derby-owned enterprise and Kiwi small business, so no real excuses not to check her out. She's also got a good range of safety gear, bearings, wheels and other nick-knacks for you to spend the rent on.

So, which skate is the best for starting out on? My first set of skates were some ex-rental dinosaurs, with outdoor wheels and a mishmash of cheapo ABEC 3 bearings and the ones that came with the skates (so are older then me and make an amazing death-rattle). I stuck it out with these for over three months, enduring sliced open toes, having to wear three pairs of socks to training and wheels that felt like they were made out of old glue stick and bubble gum. Eventually I saved up enough money and got a pair of bright green Sure-Grip Rebels with Fugitive wheels (I asked for green, so it's OK). They cost me $350 and changed my skating life. No, really. Discovering that skates weren't actually meant to steal the skin off your toes, and that wheels would roll after you stopped pushing was a revelation on a Biblical scale. Rebels are the Sure-Grip answer to the Riedell R3, which is slightly cheaper but lost out to the Rebels because a) the Rebels are made of leather, b) they came with a better quality wheel (Caymans, are, apparently, a bit below-par) and c) they come in GREEN! (among many other colours). A lot of players start out on either R3s or Rebels, and they're a really good budget option.

What's not to love?

So, once you've bought your new best friend, how do you look after them? Queen of the Rink (which you should bookmark NOW) offers an excellent series of videos on everything from bearing cleaning to truck loosening. Wet Spot of the Minnesota Roller Girls talks you through a lot of the basics, and it's worth watching. If you're more a textual learner, Sin City Skates have a series of PDFs and blog posts, outlining skate construction, bearing cleaning, how the hardness system for wheels works and more. They also have an article on dealing with the horror that is...PAD STINK.

So anyway, pads. I started out with a $20 helmet from the Warehouse and a $70 set of "Industrial" knee, elbow and wrist guards from North Beach Surf and Skate. And you know what? They did me fine to start with. Since then I've moved on to TSG knee pads and Triple 8 wrist savers, but the elbow pads are the ones I started with and the helmet is still going, if in need of replacement (derby sweat will destroy everything you've ever loved. Fact). Next step is to buy a new helmet, so I can put eye-searing orange writing on it. And stickers.

Knee pads are the biggy, and most women have issues with their knees getting banged up and injured. If your knees need extra protection but you don't feel ready to drop over $150 on a pair of 187 pads, may I recommend a trip to your local sports shop and buy a pair of volleyball gaskets for about $40? These lightweight, soft pads slip underneath your hardshell kneepads and give that extra padding that can really help protect you. Nike do a great set in black, I really recommend (Mizuno do slightly cheaper ones, but they're white so look really nasty after a few trainings and the padding is, IMO, less than useful).

Nike "Bubble" volleyball knee gaskets.

I just want to make it clear that cheap knee pads and gaskets are not as good as proper knee pads, but they are a cheaper option and allow you to get up and running on your own gear without a huge outlay. You also know exactly what you're putting on each time, without wondering if they've been kicked around the rink the last few weeks or had someone wear them who hasn't seen the inside of a shower in the last three weeks.

I was going to cover clothing, getting ready for starting to train and a few other things, but this post is enormous, so I shall leave it there for now. I hope this is useful to anyone reading, let me know if you feel I've missed out anything or if I'm just plain wrong....