Is ass-denting a medical condition?

Another Monday, another scrimmage night and some veerrrrry intense enduro training. I like to think that my fitness is pretty reasonable. OK, so I'm only now getting back into a gym regime after a few weeks regrouping and sorting myself out (and have gone back onto smoking a few roll-ups a day. No, I'm not proud of myself), but on the whole I think I can keep the pace. And tonight I discovered that I can, as long as I'm skating the right way.

In the Old Country, counter-clockwise (or widdershins, as it was so delightfully known), was the direction taken by witches around the cauldron, and considered something of an unholy way of going about things (see what I did there?). So naturally in derby, it is the ONLY way of going about things. At the moment, my skates are set up with a borrowed set of Heartless wheels. On the wheels closest to the inside line I have the green, softer (90a) wheels and the white super-hard (96a) ones on the outside. I'm finding this set-up to be TOTALLY KICKASS, and will find it very hard to part with them when the owner needs them back (they cost about $200NZ a set, so I'm saving up) and have been raving about how awesome thinner wheels are for me, and how they grip the track so much better, especially on crossovers.

This all works and is lovely when one is going widdershins.

However, turn us round and make us skate all-out for four minutes, and I discover A Thing. The hard wheels are now on the inside, the pushing side, and all of a sudden I am slipping out and making like Bambi. I don't fall on the endurance bit (just), but it was an interesting wake-up call to the limitations of my set-up and one that I'll have to consider if we do more clockwise drills in the future.

Gear aside, I wasn't skating at full throttle tonight. I'd foolishly gone to the gym and done weights for the first time in almost a month, and my thigh muscles weren't up for more abuse, let alone derby abuse. I felt more uncoordinated than usual, and fell more often than I'd like. the most impressive one came during a two-on-two scrimamge drill, when Skate the Muss knocked me flying. It was an awesome block, very nicely done, but I actually appear to have developed a dent in my left buttock. A dent. I was unaware that backsides worked on the same degrees of prangitude as the passenger sides of old Nissans, but there you go. Truly, I have learned a valuable thing. It hurts like hell, and if I wake up to an exciting bruise I shall attempt to take a work-safe photo, for poster(ior)ity.

So, back onto wheels. I have a set of Fugitives that I'm going to pass on. They're in good condition, black (so have a harness rating of 92A). Don't get me wrong, they are a good wheel, but as a personal preference I prefer thinner wheels to the wider Fugitives. They're an awesome step up from Caymans or whatever, and I've really enjoyed using them (until I developed foolishly expensive tastes). If you're interested, drop me a line on here. They're $150NZ new, I'll accept any reasonable offer!